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The Onion has an exclusive!



and in other news ....

WASHINGTON - Frustrated by Democrats and even a few Republicans, President Bush on Monday circumvented the Senate and appointed embattled nominee John Bolton to be ambassador to the United Nations.

“He is the right man for the job,” Bush told reporters at the White House. “This post is too important to leave vacant any longer, especially during a war and a vital debate about U.N. reform.”

Bush has the power to fill vacancies without Senate approval while Congress is in recess. Under the Constitution, a recess appointment during the lawmakers’ August break would last until a newly elected Congress takes office in January 2007.